For me the most important thing about love, life and everything is having the right tempo at the right time. Someone once told me that, in life, it’s all about rhythm and flow. This phrase has stuck with me ever since. It is almost like my golden acid test (aqua regia) for just about anything. If the rhythm and flow are right, then whatever it is, it must succeed! Consider if the rhythm and flow-test applies to the following:
Discussion – check!
Downhiill skiing – check!
Bedroom gymnastics – check!
Acoustic music – check!
Boxing – check!
Debating – double check and three exclamation marks!
See, it works like a charmed train toilet!
It’s the greatest thing when you are completely synchronized with your life, your partner, your physique, hell, the whole universe! I feel this sometimes in the mirror of my dance studio, when the whole crazy group of flaming girls just flies in unison and the song is JUST PERFECTION. And at other times, when me and my sister talk in staccato, matching the speed of our thoughts perfectly.
Everyone has their beat. Mine is somewhere between Dragonforce and A7X, when at full operational capacity. People who are more like Johnny Cash, drive me up the wall sometimes.
In a relationship, there are various kinds of different issues that swirl around tempo:
– the clock speed of thinking (very crucial!)
If one is not able to jump into my train of thought (sometimes a Maglev running amok), if he is not even able to hang on to the last car like a cliffhanger, it just does not work, right? I’ll just choo choo into the sunset.
– the zero to “red hot coal of hate” ratio
They say opposites attract. That’s BS at least to me. Opposites really cream my corn (thanks Urban Dictionary, for that one) !!! I am not sure of the actual speed at which I can go from mellow to mayhem, but I’m sure I’m pret-ty good. If that is actually a good thing. Anyway, if the person supposed to be my other half looks like a pot of sour milk when I am near spontaneous combustion, well, BOOM.
– the rhythm of loooove (you really should know this track by the Scorpions!)
– the time it takes to reach a decision
There are two kinds of people in the world. The kind that actually do some math before making decision and the kind just go ahead and DO IT. I am personally responsible for poor paintwork in various apartments because the part where you put the painter’s tape on is just SO BORING. Bring these two very different species of people together and you will get a) a mess b) someone repeating “I told you so” c) an epic battle. Bring 2xDO IT people together and you will get a mess with two people admiring it with a couple of cold beers. Bring 2XMATH people together and you will get a folder for plans and if you can stick around long enough, maybe something else will happen too.
– the downtime-time rate / aka HRest
Rest is important. For me, it is as necessary as espresso. Sometimes I just need to look at the clouds, kick off my Ironfist shoes, create a “somebody else’s problem”- force field around the kitchen, flick open a Sol and BREATHE. Usually I am way too lazy to even slice up the limes. Then … if someone keeps buzzing around with the vacuum cleaner, strides in waving a shopping list or an agenda of ANY kind, I give them the gold fish stare and pretend they are a part of a mute black and white film. I do.
Tempo is everything. We only live as long as our hearts BEAT. We only travel as long as our steps echo on the pavement. Be true to your beat. Choose people who match your pulse.