In the spirit of Bridget Jones,
I decided to publish some interesting statistics about the year 2012.
Ah, 2012, “… twas the best of times, and the worst of times”, as you shall be able to deduce from the highly mathematical facts available below.
# of houses rented for a ridiculous amount of money: 1
# of personal bankruptcies due to houses rented for a ridiculous amount of money: 2
# of live-in-husbands acquired: 1 (Good for me!)
# of divorces finalized: 1
# of stomach flus survived: 3
# of drinking glasses broken: probably around 10 (none intentionally)
# of houses sold for a ridiculously low price: 1
# of books read: an all time low 3
# of trips abroad: an all time low 1 (destination: Sweden, at position 1345 on my list of favorite places to visit)
# of windows washed in the house rented for a ridiculous amount of money: 0! Ha!
# of major renovations and complete business relaunches completed: 1! Yeah! Go Energanzá!
# of thousands of euros somehow misplaced: too embarrassed to reveal
# of Zumba® classes instructed: probably close to 100 (?)
# of mind-blowingly awesome and extremely hard dance choreographies learned from YouTube: 4 (Success!)
# of blogs started: 2
# days of sunbathing and tropical drinks: 0! Disgraceful!
# of song lyrics completely rewritten for personal purposes: 2
# of traffic violations due to excessive speeding: 0
# of Hayabusa rides including excessive speeding: COUNTLESS!
# of Dads who died tragically and left me permanently marked with The Summoning Dark: 1
# of tattoos inked to my skin: 4
# of lazy days: TOO FEW.
# of rock band projects started: 1
# of rock bands effectively killed due to getting caught “in flagrante delicto” with the guitarist: 1 (oh, I think this was last year, but hey who’s counting)
# of movies watched: HUNDREDS! THOUSANDS!
# of bottles of wine enjoyed with said guitarist: oh, close to 30 (I am rounding this figure a bit)
# of crazies spotted outside our house: 5 to 6 really crazy ones (note: I am only counting the crazies outside the house)
# of cleaning ladies employed: 2
# of cleaning ladies sacked due to personal bankruptcy: 2 (GAAAH!)
# of insane ex-wives one has to deal with: 1 (weeeelll, maybe only 0.25 due to the fact that the said ex-wife comes with the personality of a pencil)
# of calls to 112: 2 (one related to the crazies outside the house, one for calling ambulance for self)
# of Fridays spent in Jack the Rooster: every other week, so, probably 25 (?)
# of new friends: up from last year’s all time low (of 2) to at least 10!
# of visits to the infamous outback country of Finland (Pohjanmaa): 1
And last but not least:
# of marriage proposals: 1 (OMG!)
# of wedding plans in Pinterest or elsewhere: 0 (HAHA!)
Year 2012, the cap is back on. I shall remember you with a bitter-sweet-suprising-slightly soggy taste.
Year 2013, are you going to be a bit more fizzy?